Using EQ to Determine Friendships
The social world of kids is like Lord of the Flies, bring out the pig's head! There's a lot of talk about bullying in America. It is a real issue, but we need to do a better job of empowering our children to stand up for themselves and attack the issue from both sides. We had a great conversation on a situation where my daughter saw two kids interacting on unequal terms. One child attempted to corral a group against another so that no one would play with the other child. Fortunately my daughter voiced her opinion (or at least that is what she told me). This segued into our conversation about why some people mistreat others.
There are basically 2 types of people in this world- those for us and those against us. It's important that we determine which people fit into which category. It's not always apparent from the onset. Teaching kids to observe their friends' behavior toward them and others is important. Since most behavior is consistent, we can determine if someone is a "nice person" based off of their interactions with everyone, not just us.
These few tips will help kids maneuver socially:
1. Teaching kids to respect themselves and others
2. Teaching them to stand up for what they believe in
3. Helping them to speak and act with confidence
4. Helping them understand that everyone will not be their friend (and that is ok)
The Role of Authority in Our Lives
The question of authority comes up in our home a lot. Why do we have to listen to our parents in the first place? My role as their parent is to establish an understanding of boundaries and respect. Authority is a real thing. We like to make sure that everyone knows their rights and liberties, but it is important for parents to also train their children to respect authority. I want my kids to know their rights and know when they can exercise their rights. I also want my kids to know that boundaries exist so that we can all live together safely. Authority is not always a bad thing.