I decided to teach myself how to code... yes I was determined to learn HTML and CSS and Java and JQuery. Fortunately this past summer my graduate program literally threw me into the fire and the bit of coding I had acquired before hand was the life vest that kept me afloat and helped me to succeed. (My final project was an art website/blog for my sister.) Prior to the course however, I decided to try coding because like spoken word, it is a language. It's how we communicate with computers and it has become so deeply ingrained in all aspects of society. I can literally see a potential future where people actually talk in tags... Technology is an integral part of our survival these days. I see it in two parts- the language and the medium. The language (coding) is the way we express ourselves through the tools (phones, computers, apps, video games) we use to make our lives convenient or fun. Many of us only participate on the medium end because we see the language portion as foreign, difficult and frustrating- and it is. However, many programs now make the language of code more accessible by simplifying the learning process and the fundamental concepts. In my personal journey with technology it's been much easier to adapt to using tools than learning the language which is why I began implementing the use and understanding of technology in the lives of my children quite early.
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Growing up I had Barbie and Ninja Turtles. I had Legos and cars and baby dolls and a massive Barbie mansion where all of my toys went to epic parties in. Although my brother did not come for a while, my sister and I were raised for 8 years of my life in a very gender neutral way by today's terms. We had moments when we got dirty and then moments when we were dressed to the hilt in frills and lace and curls and patent leather shoes. I had young childhood friends who only had “girl stuff”. I wondered where the cars and action figures were. Even as a kid, I knew that the way I was raised, was how I wanted to raise my daughters. Lately, actually always, I've found myself fighting a losing battle with gender stratified and specifically female marketed toys. This is particularly troubling as I like to present a balanced approach to gender roles in my parenting style. In fact I'd rather lead a brood of jocky nerds than a bunch of fussy prisses. I wouldn't know what to do if they decided to cheer for the team instead of play on the team. In fact, I might die. Then I thought that sentiment may be unfair. So instead of dying I might find a way to bring some edge to whatever they chose… want to cheer- you’re doing gymnastics. Want to dance- competitive cheer. Being aggressive and competitive are important to me and I want them to understand that when they compete it’s not for attention- how they look, but intention- what they can do. There’s nothing wrong with being a woman, but there’s sooooo much wrong with what society expects women to do. Kid: Mom how was your dad as a dad? Me: Huh? Kid: Yeh how was your dad? Me: What do you mean? Kid: Well was he a good dad like ours? Me: Well my dad... (What should I say. My dad abandoned us the summer of my 10th birthday). Well, my dad didn't live with us. Kid: Neither does our dad. Me: Yeh I know but it was different. Kid: How so? The voices faded into the background because I was driving my van and was at a loss for words. My father has a great relationship with his grandkids, a decent one with a few of his kids and I'm not sure how he feels about himself. So the whole convo threw me and I was at a loss... When do I tell them? It's Black History Month... and lately, I've been thinking a lot about race relations in this country. From shootings of black boys to having a black president, I think about where we are and where we are going. The progress in this country seems vast, but actually we really have not come that far. I was attacked for standing by my views during the Michael Brown hearing. I still stand by those views, proudly. Nothing will change that. But I will say that I've learned a lot about how people choose not to listen to each other by watching, reading and responding to banter shared during this epic moment of conflict. Growth is painful. Maybe as a country, we aren't growing as fast as we thought and recently, we had to actually face that fact. Unfortunately, facing that fact meant that lives were lost; lives that people believed to be expendable. There has to come a moment where all of us- black people, white people, Asian people, Hispanic people and anyone else I didn't name- looks at their own racist beliefs because everyone has them and to say that you don't is ridiculous. Welcome those thoughts, rationalize through them and see if they are rooted in fact or opinion. Why do you feel like this? What experiences have caused this response in you? Let's move forward, because until then we'll just keep oppressing each other which ushers us once again down a dark spiral of blame-game and staunch opposition. |
I'm a former teacher and former college athlete, currently working to make life more equitable for all people. My mission is to get parents to partner with their child's teacher.
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